They will crucify me for this, I’m sure.
Sometimes, grammar doesn’t matter. The grammar that matters today didn’t exist a century ago. It’ll change a time or two again before we die. Try not to get hung up on it.
Language is dependent on grammar. The neural construct of grammar (you better believe it exists!) is how a child learns the difference between nouns and verbs. Grammar, like language, is fluid and dependent on your audience.
As a writer, as a creator, getting your point across supersedes just about everything. Grammar is the tool to ensure the point arrives as intended.
Keep your language too prim and proper, and grammar won’t matter because they’ve tuned out.
Most of what we learn about grammar and language happens early in life before we can comprehend what we are learning. Later, our grammar is corrected after we’ve made mistakes. It’s very much a “not this, but that” approach which, well, sucks.
Language is fluid, and grammar is fluid. Which way the fluid flows depends on your intended audience. How much do you want to appeal to them? How hard should they have to work to get to your level?
Plenty of points have been made with what some would call “sub-par” grammar. Other stories have been told wonderfully because of their obtuse grammar.
If grammar is keeping you from getting your words to the page, then damn it all.
If grammar is keeping your words from finding the right audience in the right way, then maybe don’t damn it all.